Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize
