make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize