The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences In Dating Men And Women
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
