i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Just pee around me
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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