Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
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