Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Randomize