I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Randomize
