Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
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FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
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