Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize