In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.