sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
