What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize