3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food