yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
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