I want leopard sheets
thats the plan
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
30+ People Share Their Worst ‘Intimate Experience’ And They’re Traumatizing
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...