where does the pee come out of this thing
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect