I murdered the dance floor call the cops
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize