So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
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