Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
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He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize