So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Randomize
