I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Randomize