im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
