sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.