I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
