Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Boobs are out for the taking
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
