So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Bring me that man meat
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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