what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
