he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
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I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
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It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
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