erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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