his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
so he's a sleeptalker.
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.