And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
