Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
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