Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Randomize
