you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son