It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.