Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Randomize
