that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
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I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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