I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize
