Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (213): View more from California

  I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (213): I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg. http://tfl.nu/mbc8
  Replies (1) Good night (2283) Bad night (1156)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  "I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): "I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words. http://tfl.nu/5sbe
  Replies (8) Good night (875) Bad night (1843)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over. http://tfl.nu/nwsy
  Replies (40) Good night (16118) Bad night (2218)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (252): U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry http://tfl.nu/sko0
  Replies (41) Good night (3936) Bad night (1520)
• Favorite

  (551): View more from New Jersey

  the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (551): the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit http://tfl.nu/ma7y
  Replies (45) Good night (9094) Bad night (858)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy? http://tfl.nu/i95d
  Replies (276) Good night (4240) Bad night (27065)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine http://tfl.nu/sllr
  Replies (7) Good night (2213) Bad night (970)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night http://tfl.nu/nrlr
  Replies (12) Good night (7071) Bad night (905)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag http://tfl.nu/7pz9
  Replies (11) Good night (1435) Bad night (3779)
• Favorite

  (971): View more from Oregon

  There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (971): There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is. http://tfl.nu/8jyt
  Replies (4) Good night (1671) Bad night (479)
• Favorite

  (289): View more from Ontario

  Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (289): Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food. http://tfl.nu/bfcw
  Replies (8) Good night (3484) Bad night (734)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem. http://tfl.nu/a4iw
  Replies (11) Good night (828) Bad night (1785)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  Drinking loves me for WHO I am

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): Drinking loves me for WHO I am http://tfl.nu/nlm7
  Replies (3) Good night (1152) Bad night (351)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.

  (520): View more from Arizona

  Judging by this purple one they got to second base.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (520): They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up. (520): Judging by this purple one they got to second base. http://tfl.nu/efot
  Replies (3) Good night (911) Bad night (354)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (408): My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside. http://tfl.nu/vhza
  Replies (10) Good night (1225) Bad night (333)

Randomize