the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
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Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
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I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
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