i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
21 Distraught People Found Out They Had An STD
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own