I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
