I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
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