More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.