Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I intend to get homeless drunk
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
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