this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
