And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
