So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
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I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
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The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious