brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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