i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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